TMI

This is a whole post about poop. It will be seriously TMI (too much information) for some of you, so I'd recommend skipping this post if you're already freaked out. If you're intrigued, amused, or have physical or mental poop issues, I recommend reading on.

I love poop. I think I got stuck in the 4-year-old phase of development, because I've been fascinated & amused by poop for as long as I can remember. Poop levels the playing field, I think. It creates solidarity. I like that "we all poop." It's one of those basic things that brings us all to the same human level. I guess, in that sense, there's an element of justice to poop. Wow, leave it to me to find the deeper meaning of poop. Does everything have to have meaning? Um, yes.

Justice & meaning aside, I also find humor in such a complex and absurd function that our bodies do on a daily basis (hopefully). I think part of the humor is that I love the endorphin rush I get after I poop. It's a scientific fact that this happens & that endorphins create pleasure. Many of you who deny this little pooping pleasure are likely telling a farce. Endorphins feel good - even via poop.  

Another thing you may or may not want to know is that I take pride in my efficiency in this particular arena & my ability to do it anytime and anywhere - a useful skill when one backpacks & travels to places like Cameroon. I connected a few dots, and in the past year, I have perfected my pooping technique. I'm going to describe it to you, because it's awesome. In short, I simply pull my heels up on the seat of the toilet in front of my bum so that I'm basically in a squatting position on the toilet. Dude, it's a totally different pooping experience, and I swear there are more endorphins released in this position. Not to mention an in sane amount of efficiency.

Since discovering this position, I've been trying to convince Baine that this is the way to go. Sadly, he does not share my passion for poop, so he just shakes his head & occasionally laughs at me.

Well, guess what. The tables have turned. I got an email from Baine today with a link to THIS ARTICLE. Let it be known, my friends... Not only is my pooping technique good, it is medically RIGHT.

I knew this, of course, which is why I've tried to make a few converts to my technique. The reason I thought of squatting in the first place is because that's how I help my clients have their babies. I figured if babies can come out gently that way, other stuff probably works better that way too. Not to mention observing how most other mammals poop and enough of my own pooping-in-the-woods experiences to confirm that. I have a few tips for the woods thing too that I'm happy to share with you privately if you're curious.

So there you have it. You survived my graphic poop stories & now have a wonderful image in your head of me squatting on the toilet. I promise you'll be less disturbed once you try it yourself & feel the ease of this daily ritual. Give it a try. Your booty will thank you.